The #1 habit that led to my success

The Benefits of Daydreaming

Hi Reader,

In this week’s issue, I would like to tell you about a conversation that I had on X (formerly Twitter). So, one user posted:

As I was thinking about my response, I was picturing a face-face conversation with him, and then it hit me — daydreaming. I daydream often, and that habit tends to let me understand certain aspects of my life. Having said this, he stated that he does it as well and thought it was self-indulgence. And it can be.

Daydreaming is a time-sink, and therefore needs to be done in moderation. It’s obviously dangerous if you are driving or walking on the street. But more so, it’s counterproductive when you should have full focus on a problem, a lecture, getting things done etc. Depending on your disposition and your thought process, you may find yourself going to unhappy places mentally, stressing over to-dos and littles annoyances that you can’t control.

But here is how I use it effectively, how it has helped me move forward, and how I avoid overindulging or wasting time.

It helps with critical and creative thinking

I often visualize my goals and dreams, even those that seem far-fetched. Playing a scenario in my head that involves one, visualizing the exact process of achieving my goals, or two, explaining a concept or a presentation to someone helps me with problem-solving, and helps me to look at an issue from a different perspective. Throwing in a debate with a public figure that has different views than I do, builds my creative and critical thinking skills, and I get to know more about myself.

It helps with clarity

Sometimes I have an idea in my mind, but I can’t articulate it well. Day-dreaming helps me to gain clarity on any particular issue as I explore the concepts from different angles with a scenario that could very much play out in real life. As they say, if you can’t explain something, you don’t really understand it.

It helps with empathy and emotional quotient (EQ)

Ok, so I love to play the devil’s advocate right. It is annoying to friends and family, but really helps me to think critically, and helps to look at things from other people’s perspective. I translate this trait to winning debates. I would look for sources for the opponent’s argument, and debate my own stance as if I am debating against myself. I look for every reason and every angle why my argument doesn’t hold up and refute my own claims. This reverse psychology puts me in the opponent’s shoes. Even though the purpose of this process in debates is to prepare for anything that the opponent may come with, it also helps me to be empathetic as I can feel and understand the other side of the coin. Playing the devil’s advocate in my day dreaming builds on that and increases my EQ.

I get to know more about myself, the good, the bad and the ugly

So here is one danger of daydreaming. Many people love to hang on to the past, stress over things they can’t control, and put themselves in painful scenarios, which ultimately lead to depression and anxiety. When you introspect, you get to know what’s lurking in your subconscious. Making a mental note of these things makes me more self-aware. It also helps me to see if I am the jackass. Yes that’s a reality too many people ignore.

In cases where I day-dream about the mansion on the hill, I become more aware of my likes and dislikes. Am I a penthouse with a pool on the roof type of person, or a long driveway with manicured lawns type of person?

Become more emotionally independent

Ok so I am an introvert so I find being alone with my thoughts thrilling. But even as an extrovert, being alone with your thoughts, in my opinion, means you don’t need social validation for your choices, success and progress in life. Enjoying my own company makes me more emotionally independent and I can be alone without being lonely. It makes it easier to remove myself from toxic situations and situations that no longer serve me.

Mindfulness and acting with intentions

Ok, remember I mentioned earlier that daydreaming can be a slippery slope?

• It wastes time
• It may lead to depression and anxiety
• It can be counterproductive as many people are in over their heads about their dreams, but never do anything about them.

For these reasons, many people suppress the urge for their minds to wander. From time to time I would do this, especially at work, or during some other important tasks. However, the itch remained and I would waste energy trying to suppress it. To counter this, I deliberately indulge during my breaks or during menial activities, and sometimes track my time.

As far as dark thoughts go, I try to go to a happy place, or focus on a solution to a problem I currently have.

Lastly, and most importantly for my success, I visualize a process for achieving my goal. I always check-in with my current thought process, roadblocks etc. to see what aligns with my overall objective, what needs to change, and how I could better approach a situation. I even, at times, deliberately think of a harder way to do something, you know, challenge myself in a new way. I usually journal any new perspectives, and set low hanging fruit goals accordingly. I practice this enough times, and I become more attuned with my time, who I am, and my goals.

What’s your process?

What’s your number habit that led to your success?